ITEM: Wouldn't everything we think about raising infants be different, wouldn't all the arguments be different, wouldn't all the dogmas be different, if even a few people were able to remember back then? (Without, like, hypnosis.)
And wouldn't everything be even more different if everyone were able to remember back then?
ITEM: Should I be more annoyed that my employer broadcast my forthcoming maternity leave to the entire faculty (in the middle of a long list of personnel actions that contained, sadly, no other worthwhile gossip), or that no one on campus wrote afterwards? Hmmmmmm.
ITEM: Our sublet features a couple of houseplants which outweigh us by a fair margin. I don't mind them; Beaker hates them. Yet it is Beaker who waters them every week, ranting all the while about the mold festering under the pots. Recently he spent all morning on a ladder polishing the leaves of the largest, which has a little scale problem. (He did let himself prune the dangling roots that get caught in his hair.)
What does this bode for future dependents of ours?
ITEM: Don't unicyclists have to follow the rules of the road? Even when they're, like, really late to yoga class? (I saw a guy with a purple mat under his arm blow through a stop sign this morning. Chee!)
ITEM: Why won't the damn blue (but dark blue, really it's almost black) helicopter out there stop circling overhead?