Height of stack of remaining grading: inches.
Time until grades are due: days.
Time until birth: days (I hope).
Folks: don't try this at home, no matter how much you'd like to really max out your institution's parental leave policy.
I do feel a bit of (survivor's?) guilt with respect to how it all looks to outside observers, most especially junior female ones. Look, I wasn't trying to do this. Really.